[ This is a little too much. You know, you've been desperately fighting something for years and years and then it gets taken from you? There is a sense of paranoia that comes with that. Especially if you've been able to sense danger approaching - up to now. Now there's silence. You know they're nowhere, but you feel they could be anywhere. With losing his ability to feel guignols approaching and ending up here, panic has slowly crept through Kohaku's mind where he tried to ignore it. The NPCs were bothersome reminders of what zombies could be like, but he'd like to tell himself he didn't care too much.
Now that the NPCs were repeating garbled nonsense, just like the guignol-virus affected brains would, it was simply too much.
It was a weird realization, now knowing he didn't want to be dead. There had been a time when he didn't mind being nothing but canon fodder, but not anymore. He'd been in the middle of a war, leaving the stage like he had was the worst feeling. Kohaku tried to tell himself he didn't care what happened to his orchestra mates, but it still felt like he left Eles alone... Maybe even left Lucille alone. He hated the man so much, but as it was he was all he'd been living for - dying in the gutter, a random zombie... That wasn't what that angel-faced singing devil deserved.
He'd been running - looking plain angry, but actually headless in a name-less fear, until he reached the rooftop of the school and felt vaguely safe. The guignols were now haunting him more than when they were present - this wasn't a fear and a pain he could grasp and punch into the next century. It was all in his head and the worst was that he knew.
Kohaku let himself drop down on a bench and buried his face in his hands. He knew he was shaking. Now, having Lucille here wouldn't have been so bad. Just a little reminder of purpose... though you probably didn't need a purpose when you were dead, did you? ]Tch... Never thought I'd ever miss that damned scar... Lucille... It's your fault for being so damn reckless--!! If you hadn't gone to that fucking castle, then....
[ Talking to himself - or rather people who weren't here - was pathetic as much as comforting. It was terrifying to be alone, but right now Kohaku just hoped nobody would find him like this. ]