eleven ◆ action / text

[extraordinarily]

OPTION A: action / outside the school

[ Haruhi’s sitting on a bench today, looking up in the sky melancholically. She honestly can’t believe what happened, and honestly, it’s completely and utterly embarrassing. She’ll just muse to herself, speaking aloud.

And she’s kind of angry, too. ]

I can’t believe I actually did that… Augh! It’s so stupid! I can’t believe I actually did that! I hate being normal, and that person—she wasn’t me. She wasn’t me at all.

OPTION B: text

Attention everybody!

If you saw me while those stupid shadows were around, you better forget about it, alright? That person wasn’t the real Suzumiya Haruhi. Especially you, Kyon! If you remember anything about what happened… I’ll kick you down a flight of stairs, got it?!

Also! To those who just arrived, I’m sorry. I was a huge jerk.

Oh, and Koizumi-kun. We need to talk. In private.

That is all. If you have any questions, though, I don’t mind answering.

Comments

[extraordinarily]

That's right.

[tenminutes]

I won't mind if he joins the SSS too.

[ You know so you all can be together. Yuri's being so nice isn't she it isn't like she just wants to recruit him or anything. ]

[extraordinarily]

Well, I was planning on making him join the SSS anyway. Considering that he's my subordinate.

[tenminutes]

I should give you an officer title at some point.

[ She doesn't even have officer titles.. ]

[extraordinarily]

And why exactly should I, Yuri?

[tenminutes]

You don't want one?

[extraordinarily]

It doesn't really matter to me.

[tenminutes]

Fine fine, you can stick to being peon#4!

[extraordinarily]

Number... 4? Why number four, anyway?

[tenminutes]

Well there's Otonashi, who's peon#1 and Naoi is a sub-contracted peon so he's like 1b, Leon is peon#2, Vin is peon#3. You can be 4 because I just promoted you above Kyon.

[ In other words, her numbering is completely arbitrary. ]

[extraordinarily]

Why am I above Kyon but below that idiot?

[ You know who she means, most likely. ]

[tenminutes]

Which idiot? You're going to have to be more specific.

[ They're all idiots, Haruhi.. ]

[extraordinarily]

Leon.

[tenminutes]

Because if I put him up higher on the list he'll think something stupid and I'll have another reason to invest in a popcorn machine for HQ.

[extraordinarily]

And why can't you put him lower? He's a big idiot.

[tenminutes]

He's fun?

[ She likes him, they're friends, whatever Haruhi!! Her numbers are all made up anyway and shes not gonna sit here and tsun about friendship! ]

It doesn't really matter. You had your chance to be higher and you said you didn't want to so now you're peon#4.

[extraordinarily]

And you're saying I'm no fun at all?

[tenminutes]

Not when you're acting like a jealous girlfriend.

[ That was very matter of fact.

She's mostly just teasing though.

Because really, Yuri is having fun right now |D ]

[extraordinarily]

Well, I'd rather die than be lower than the Mayor of Idiot Town!

[tenminutes]

Peon#5!

[extraordinarily]

Do you want me to come and punch you in the face, Yuri?

[tenminutes]

Threatening your leader... Maybe I'll make it 6.

[extraordinarily]

What, do you honestly expect me to kiss your ass and do whatever you want in order to get my rank up? Maybe I really should become the student council president.

[tenminutes]

No but it's entertaining to watch you get mad about it. Why do you think Leon gets #2? He's fun to tease. Naoi doesn't kiss my ass at all and he's #1b, remember? Neither does Otonashi. You're the one getting all mad about numbers I made up on the fly aren't you?

[extraordinarily]

That's like a stupid popularity ranking.