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IMPORTANT TO EVERYONE!!

Accel had a good idea. I'm not going to ask all of you to spill your secrets to me or anything, but by now I'm going to hope that most of you have at least one or two people you trust.

So everyone drop their name here if you're willing to volunteer to hold secret someone's important moments. If you want to trust someone with your important memory as a precaution in case you get caught by the shadows, reply to them in a locked thread.

If you would rather be shot instead of telling someone a way you think might be able to save you, I'll volunteer to take anyone out quickly and painlessly.

ADDITIONALLY: I keep getting a ton of requests for atomic restructuring, so I'm going to do a workshop on Friday at 1pm. Show up or don't complain. And if you do show up, don't complain either. Even if you're a genius at picking things up, it'll take at least 3 hours to even make a little pin. It's not easy, it takes a lot of concentration and imagination, and you're going to have to practice on your own.

If there aren't any questions, make a comment to volunteer if you're willing to help with any of those.

{{ OOC: if your character is going to the workshop, RSVP them here. Otherwise, feel to comment around to anyone! }}

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[ Just get the dullest look in the world Leon.. ]

Well you're going to end up stuck as one of those mindless freaks if you don't. They'll probably make you out to be a super-nerd, how uncool.

We're using dirt, I definitely wouldn't want anyone inside.

Well if I do it right the first time, it's not going to matter if you're knocked out or not. If it's in the back of the head as a sneak attack, you're not going to know until you wake up.

Not really. I've made things from pinwheels to propulsion engines.

No idea beyond the obvious. Considering she's keeping us safe, which I don't know if I trust anyway, we can't exactly go interrogate her.

You think you're the only one who understands where he's coming from? Just because you understand it doesn't mean you have to believe in it, or that you have to give into it.

Being able to live a normal life like that, enjoying the stupid, simple things like laughing with a friend in class and zoning out during class then screaming when you didn't take notes and there's a quiz the next day.. that kind of peace would be a beautiful thing. But if you give up who you are, you lose everyone you've ever cared about anyway. You lose them, you lose yourself, and you disrespect their memory by forgetting them. You'd forget the good along with all of the bad. Most of us have been sick and tired of everything even before we died. But when it comes down to it, giving up is no good, okay?

Fair point. But I'm pretty impressed at how smoothly all of this is going. It seems not one of us are NPCs anymore for the time being.

Once things get organized it's a lot easier to function as a group, that's all.

Working together is always a good plan, in all honesty.

Because I understand is the reason why I have to force myself to forget.

In the end, they weren't able to remember me at all anyway, so what's the point of me remembering them? Even if I'm supposed to deal with it all, take it all in so I can remain being me, remain being human- but I don't even know if I can do that anymore. I've already lost myself by being here and finding out the truth. It was supposed to end once I found that! I was excited; there were really aliens, time travelers, and espers, you know! That was my goal in life. To find something different, to find something that wasn't ordinary. Day in and day out, I kept on repeating the same thing over and over again, but then I decided to change it all. Of course, I couldn't do it without help, but then I found out I died? I was mad! Of course I would be! After all, I didn't fulfill my goal, right? I failed as a leader. I failed everyone, I thought. But then I found out I wasn't the only one here. I wasn't alone. But I was still as insignificant as I was before. I'm only one person out of so many, over a billion people who lived on Earth. I wanted to become someone who everyone could see me. I was selfish; I wanted to be noticed by someone.

Then I found out on the first day that I came here that everything was wiped away. That's why I don't mind losing my memories. I don't mind changing my personality. It's the same as it was in reality, either way. I don't care about myself anymore, I don't care. In the end, I still failed.

I even asked if I could make a replacement. That was my plan all along, if I were to turn in Ai-chan. I was conflicted. Did I really want to delude myself into an illusion? It was possible, sure, but how long would it last? I didn't know. I wouldn't know. And I had to push all of that aside because I had to be "me". I had to play the role of the person that everyone saw Haruhi Suzumiya as. That's what was expected of me, right? As someone who was strong, made stupid decisions, kicked ass, and was completely and utterly weird, but sorry, only half of that is true at this point. That may have been who I was before, when I was alive, but a year in the afterlife changes a person.

Anyway... I should have been the one to disappear. It should have been me all along. Because, after all, it's only obvious that neither of our feelings were strong enough, right?! That's why I messed up repeatedly...!

Haha... Even though I said I didn't want to say anything, I went and said it anyay. Ah, I don't really care what you think about me, okay? I don't plan on doing anything at all at this point.

Unless the world turns upside down, I'd never trust an NPC with more than absolutely necessary.

Are we really waiting this out then?

Depends how well you mean. What else can you do?

Yeah, I guess so. Just wondering how much I'll remember. You'd be surprised what last moments can be like... or maybe not, considering you're here.

How about electronics?

Plenty of times. I died, then I've been offed more than once here. It's not even scary after a certain point, honestly. It can even be done for comedic value, really. Just ask Hinata.

[ She nods. ] They can, but you have to know how to put it together and how each of the parts are made. If you know that, then it should be possible, but if you don't then it's probably not. So for example, I can make a pin, a rod, and some cute paper, but if I don't know how to assemble them it'll be totally useless.

Hmm, I don't think I want to get to the point where I use it for laughs, you know?

I've studied software more than hardware but... well, I'll see what's possible at the workshop then.

[sighs, as if put upon in having to answer this.]

I can destroy, lift or throw anything with however much force I want, keep pace with fighter jets, walk through lava untouched, gravity is optional, and projectiles are useless against me. These are the only examples I'll give you.

Sounds pretty ridiculous. So you literally control the direction of any force? Anything at all?

The direction and magnitude. Anything, as long as it comes in contact with my body.

D-do I look like some kinda pervert to you or something?!

[HE WOULD NEVER DREAM... Okay, okay, that's not important, he has an idea.]

So this atomic restructuring thing... How good are you at it? You think you could make a watch? I guess it doesn't have to work or anything, it's just gotta look like one.

Edited 2014-05-15 07:35 (UTC)

No one expects any of that from you. Just like if I went and abandoned everyone, no one would be able to say anything. It wouldn't be the first time I've done it. Whatever you want to do is what you should do, so long as you understand that if you do something to hurt the people I care about I won't hesitate to bury you far deeper than 6 feet under.

Whatever it is you thought you were looking for in life, the paranormal probably wasn't what you really wanted. The reality is that we don't always know what we want until we lose it, and maybe that's what losing those people from your life was. Whether you failed or are a leader or if you just want to play music or throw a ball, that's what you should do.

[ Yuri pauses for a moment, hesitant to say it but.. ]

It sounds like what you want is to move on, not to become trapped here. You keep talking about a year in the afterlife, but people like the programmer were here for so much longer. Even before I was here, and I don't even know how long that was because I gave up keeping track because there wasn't a point in keeping time when you're alone.

I know you don't give a damn what I think and you obviously don't give a damn if I trust you or not, but at least know that I'm not going to lie and tell you that things get better quickly. A year is nothing, and sometimes it'll hurt and it'll pull you down, but you can't give up, Haruhi. Rather than giving up, I think you need to take some time to figure out what you want instead of what everyone else wants out of you. That's the only way to make people notice you: fight as hard as you can for what you believe in and what's in your heart. When other people see you earnestly putting yourself into something, even if you screw up or make mistakes or have a rough time, that's when they notice you. You just have to stop worrying about whether or not people notice you and worry about what you need most, okay? And I can tell you right now that you'll never have anything if you become an NPC and stay that way.

That man.. the programmer. He sought this fate because the person he loved moved on without him, and he got stuck because he loved that person so much that he couldn't move on unless he saw her again. So he decided he would make himself fall asleep unless that person's soul returned to the afterlife, but what then? Even if the 0.000000000000001% chance actually came true and she returned, she would never remember him because it wouldn't be the woman he fell in love with anymore. It would be a new person built out of similar parts. Even if she appeared, how would he know? She could look different, and he wouldn't have memories to even be able to recognize her because he was an NPC. If he woke up and fell in love, his own program would absorb him again whether he lost her or not.

That's why I know that the only way that someone who could accept becoming an NPC is someone who's given up instead of figuring out what it was they really needed. I think I understand where you're coming from now, but that doesn't mean I think you're right or that you should just give up, Haruhi. Especially not so easily.

Possibly. You look kind of like one of those guys in the movies that lean their foot out so the girl trips over their shoe and spills their french fries all over their lap, so he goes "HUE HUE HUE HUE, OJOU-CHAN~ YOU'VE GONE AND RUINED MY PANTS. I HOPE YOU'RE GOING TO CLEAN IT UP WITH THOSE SWEET LIPS OF YOURS OR I'LL HAVE TO MAKE YOU PAY FOR IT SOME OTHER WAY" but your actions aren't really like that and you don't have the heavy yakuza accent, so I gave you the benefit of the doubt.

[ Honestly, the fact that she said that with a completely straight face even while doing a stupidass accent and didn't skip a beat the whole time or laugh is probably the true miracle of this conversation. ]

I don't know how to make a watch, do you?

No one can work on their own forever if they want to accomplish anything.

The biggest problem is going to be the people who haven't learned to differentiate NPCs from humans yet in this case.

Just for now. I don't plan on staying on the defense forever. I need to figure out what the NPC knows and just what's being kept away from us. We've got a couple of people now who know a thing or two about computers; I want her coding deconstructed.

If you say so, but it's really not a big deal. We're all dead already.

--Are you any good at hacking, Niko?

[........

What the hell...

For a moment, he's literally speechless, he has no idea what to say.]

[EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT WAS GROSS AND OFFENSIVE AND HE... REALLY DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH IT...]

Th-then what the hell was the point of saying all that in the first place?! Was it even necessary?!

[He normally wouldn't even talk this way to a girl but ???]

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